A. tells us about Christmas

Our 5-year-old nephew performed his Christmas poem for us many times. Here's one such performance.

L's Poem

Here's a video of our 3-year-old niece reciting a caterpillar poem.

Thanksgiving Dinner!

Our Day with the Irish

BRRRRRR!!!! Yesterday, we took the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to attend a Notre Dame football game...at an affordable price. Our neighbor managed to squeeze four tickets out of a co-worker who is an alum of Notre Dame. So, yesterday the four of us bundled up and headed over to South Bend, Indiana. We left at 8 am with lots of layers, handwarmers, hats, coats, and hoods and made our way to Indiana where 6 inches of snow greeted us. We parked about 1 mile from the stadium, so we had a good chance to wander through the campus before and after the game. During the game, we all nearly froze to death, but had a great time watching and being a part of all the Notre Dame football traditions. We were exhausted when we arrived back home around 11:00 and crashed into a bed of warm flannel sheets. Perhaps I can convince K to leave his dissertation alone for a few minutes to add some more details, but I need to get back to my papers, so enjoy the slideshow for now---click the little caption icon to get some narration.

Pumpkin Trifle

Lots of people have been asking for the recipe for this fabulously easy and delicious dessert. Here it is...

3 cups heavy cream
15 oz pumpkin puree
1 tsp. pure vanilla extract
1 tsp. ground cinnamon
1/2 tsp. ground ginger
pinch ground cloves
pinch salt
7.5 oz. marshmallow cream
3 cups chopped gingersnaps, plus some crushed gingersnaps for sprinkling

Using an electric mexier, beat the cream until stiff. Reserve 2 cups whipped cream for serving; refrigerate until ready to serve

In a large bowl, stir together the pumpkin, vanilla, cinnamon, ginger, cloves and salt. Fold in half the marshmallow cream, then half the whipped cream. Repeat with the remaining marshmallow cream and whipped cream until combined.

Spoon one-third of the pumpkin mousse into a clear glass serving bowl, spreading evenly, and sprinkle half the cookies on top. Repeat with half the remaining mousse and the remaining cookies, then top with the final layer of mousse. Cover with plasic wrapt and refigerate at least 1 hour and up to 4 horus. Just before serving, top with reserved whipped cream and sprinkle with crushed gingersnaps.

You could also layer it in smaller glasses for individual servings.

The Amazing Hairy Bru-dini

I have been getting in trouble with P the past couple of weeks because I have allegedly forgotten to lock Bruchi in his kennel, thus leading to Bru greeting us as soon as we walk in the door. Apparently, I am "too preoccupied with other things" (e.g. dissertating, job stuff, etc.) and simply overlook the fact that the kennel needs to be latched. I was vindicated, however, when my suspicion that Bruchi had learned to open the latch on his kennel door proved to be true. Apparently, P had come home with Bru locked in his kennel only to find that, moments later, he joined her in the closet as she hung up her coat. Bru (a.k.a. the amazing bru-dini) has gotten out four times this week, which increases the escape total to about ten. Shockingly, he hasn't gotten into any trouble or made any messes once he has been out; he simply contents himself with sleeping on the couch.

Of course, those who know the history of Bruchi's precocious nature will not be surprised by this news. You will remember that we had to change all of the door handles upstairs because Bru learned to open them. Bru has also learned to prop himself up on the edge of the kitchen counter and swipe down anything that is not kept at an obscene distance (he has pulled down two Papa Murphy's pizzas).

Beagle vs. Octopus

In case you ever wondered, Beagle wins...(note victory howl!)

Out of spontaneity...

Last night we decided to break up our weekend of work and headed out to Wehrenburg to see Angelina Jolie's new movie, The Changeling. It had been awhile since K had gotten the chance to sing along with the lovely "Wehrenberg Theaters" song, and it sounded like a good idea for a cold night.The movie was good...not exactly a happy movie, but good. Its a true story about corruption in the Los Angeles police in the 20s-30s, and it will really get your feminist juices going--even those of you who don't think you have any feminist juices. Anyway...I recommend it, but K and I are both a bit puzzled about the title.

Okay...it's back to work I go!

Bad Week for Mavericks

This has been a bad week for Mavericks:

First, McCain and Palin lost the presidential election. Then, Mark Cuban gets effectively blackballed by MLB, who will "never" approve his purchase of the Chicago Cubs. Can someone say conspiracy? Someone should quickly run to their local movie store and make sure that the Mel Gibson, Jodie Foster and James Garner flick has not been removed from the shelves.

(Unexpected) Closing thoughts on the 2008 Presidential Election

It should be wildly apparent that I, and we, did not agree with the way that McCain and Palin ran their campaign. Mostly, I took issue with how McCain and Palin drew on the rhetoric of terrorism in order to cast doubt on Obama's character. I also took issue with the dumbing down of issues that are, as we are finding, quite complex. Finally, as I mentioned in the last post, I generally take issue with policies that are tailored to benefit the economic elite.

I had mixed emotions last night when McCain gave his resignation speech, however, because the man that gave that speech was not the man who ran against Obama this past year. McCain was humble, thoughtful, gracious, and hopeful, and his ethos as a speaker gave credence to the argument that the Republican party transformed him in a negative way during this election. It was with a tinge of remorse, then, that I watched this speech because, although I wanted Obama to win, more than anything I wanted to see a competitive race where both candidates presented a coherent and compelling argument for why they should assume the presidential seat. In other words, I wanted to be motivated to cast a vote not because I was afraid of what the other candidate would do in office, but because one argument was slightly better than the other.

The McCain who gave that final speech last night could have accomplished that task, and could have rallied the country in a more productive manner. Unfortunately, his rhetorical tactics polarized too many people and resulted in a landslide victory that was, in the final tally, embarrassing to the Republican party. I wonder if, when historians look back on this moment, Obama's speeches will be read as more hopeful and intelligent because McCain's were not. Either way I think we should celebrate, as many have said, that we have an African-American man in the president office who seems to promote the intellectual, political, and social values that will reduce violence and thereby increase hope.

I feel substantially more excited about our country than I have in the last eight years of my adult life.

Ten Reasons Why I Voted for the McCain/Palin Ticket at the Last Minute

Like the sticker? Go get one! And as you mull over your voting decision, here are ten reasons why I voted for the McCain/Palin ticket at the last minute.

10. With gas prices the way they are, we can no longer afford to ignore the option of off-shore drilling. DRILL BABY DRILL!

9. Because I gross approximately 5,000 dollars a year, I need a president who will NOT raise taxes. Yes, I know that Obama says that he only plans to tax the wealthy, but I can't take any chances. My supersecret plan is to evade taxes, save my hard earned teaching money, and buy the next university I am at. Just think, "K the Professor" could help the Republicans win the next election! I could be famous!

8. Because Sarah Palin is much more qualified to be a Vice President than a talk show host. Besides, I like Oprah way too much to initiate that kind of competition for daytime viewers. The unfortunate byproduct is that we may not get a Sarah Palin book of "favorite things." Of course, we do know some of the things that would be in that book: industrial strength bear traps, snow-mobiles, nifty glasses, hip-hop dance lesson tapes (for the next SNL, you go girl!), a 20% off coupon at JC Penny, a super secret earbud so people can tell you how to say the right things without anyone catching on, a shotgun, political cliffs notes, Rosetta Stone (Russian edition) so that you too can brush up on your international relations if you find yourself away from the cosmopolitan state of Alaska for too long, an unused library card (they're free dontcha know!). . .

7. Because I have a car, and can therefore afford to drive over to my neighboring states to compete for high quality health care.
Plus, after we drill the #&@*5 out of Alaska, gas will be like, what, a nickel?

6. Because research shows that famous people's baby names catch on and we don't have enough Triggers, Trappers, GrenadeLaunchers, SoupLadels, and BearKillers in the world. If you read some of the earlier posts, a successful campaign would also mean that I have a better chance at getting B to name his unborn child Boomer!

5. Because I feel that Barack Obama played the political game unfairly. McCain and he agreed to use public funding only, and when Obama got wicked popular and received more donations, he used that money to talk about his plans for the future. Dang it! We need to stick to the plan here, and for heaven's sake no more talk about actual issues. McCain shouldn't have to sell one of his ten houses in order to buy primetime television airtime. Moreover, Cindy shouldn't have to sacrifice her next face stretch surgery in order for her husband to succeed. This is bogus, we need to stick to the possibility of Obama being and fraternizing with terrorists. THAT IS THE REAL ISSUE!!!

4. Because the dang voting booth is made for little people and I couldn't bend over far enough to reach the Obama/Biden circle. Seriously, they can have a sitdown chair for the elderly, but they can't raise a booth high enough for me to reach the ballot? I may have long arms, but I am rigid as hell.

3. Because we don't need hope in this country, nor do we need bi-partisan thinking, and we sure as shooter don't need anymore talking. We need people who recognize threats, challenge those threats to a shootout near the OK corral at high noon, whip out their bazookas faster than you can say "Wasilla," blow #&*^@! up (and anything that surrounds it), and steal the oil those terrorists have been hiding in their pockets. No more talking people, we have weapons, we are angry, and we need to use them.

2. Because, in my dream last night, Joe the plumber's @$$-crack told me to...I had to listen, he fixed my imaginary leaky faucet, which seemed to drip as though it were actually real.

1. Because I woke up this morning, went to the voting station and felt like a maverick!

Peek-a-Bru

I took this picture yesterday. Thought you might enjoy knowing how cute my dog is.

Bru took a sick day...

Thought I would share this picture with you. Bru took a sick day Friday. He woke up feeling a little green, and spent the rest of the day wanting to sleep on my lap. Pretty cute, even though we would obviously prefer he was chipper-as-usual.

My Wife, Former Valedictorian, Current Scholar and Educator, Future School Administrator and Ph.D.

B, you are going to love this one!

Scene: Walking into church discussing names for our unborn children. Nearing the front doors, P looks over at me and says

P: I still really like the name Emory, but how do you want to spell that?"

K: Well, I like the more traditional spelling E-M-O-R-Y, but if you don't like that I suppose you could always spell it E-M-E-R-I-E.

P: (thinking hard for a moment) "Well, how do they spell it in the song?"

K: What song?

P: You know, (singing) "Emory and Ivory live together in perfect harmony."

K: You're joking right? You are seriously joking?

P: That's how it goes, Boz.

K: You're an idiot!

(20 minutes into the church service)

P: (taps me on the shoulder and whispers) Seriously Boz, what is wrong with the song? Emory and Ivory, right?

K: Shush, I am praying for your mental health right now.

(On the way home from church)

P: So are you going to tell me what's wrong with the song?

K: Only if I can blog about it when you realize how dumb you are.

P: No, Bozzy don't blog about it! Just tell me.

K: Ok fine, what color is ivory?

P: OHHHH, EB-ony and Ivory. Whoops (sheepish giggle).

Happy 27th Birthday, K!

Today is K's 27th birthday. We celebrated last night with our contingency of fabulous friends here in the 'Nois. This was the first year that we really had enough close friends to constitute a birthday party, so we not only celebrated K, but great friendships as well. The party was complete with appetizers and M's infamous chocolate raspberry and chocolate peanut butter cakes.

Well, since you asked...

People have been asking me whether I watched the debate between Sarah Palin and Joe Biden, and if so what I thought about it. The answer to the first question is "yes." As to the second question, here's what I thought:

1. Sarah Palin doesn't really talk like that, you know: "say it ain't so Joe" and "doggoneit Joe thereya go lookin to tha past" and "heckuva" and . . . "dontcha" and . . ."gonna." She may feel comfortable speaking in this register, but it is *clearly* a performance to influence less affluent voters.

2. Sarah Palin doesn't answer questions not because she is not able to, but because she has not been prepared to. In other words, her responses are scripted. You can literally see her searching through her memorized notes to remember what to say if Joe Biden said ______. Notice how many times she said "I'd like to go back to ________" as if she knew she would get in trouble for not making a point she had practiced so hard to learn. Biden on the other hand responded to her pretty fluidly. That doesn't mean he is better, it just means he is more experienced with this type of thing.

3. It's difficult for me to stomach the claim that she did well ... based on what standard, I wonder? Based on the low standard she set with Katie Couric?

4. I love her effort to spin what she can't control, e.g. "I love debates like this where I can tell the people what I stand for, and not have someone mediate what I have said after the clip." Yeah, I'm gonna haveta go with "notsomuch" Sarah. You may have said some smart things on camera that didn't get shown, but the media cannot script the crazy trainwrecks that have been your one on one interviews. Go consult Howard Dean on the impossibility of gaining control over stupid political blunders.

5. Joe Biden was interesting, not who the media prepared him to be. Instead of taking her on, he smiled at her jokes. And why shouldn't he, she is endearing. At the same time, I don't know what to do with his emotional eruptions when he talks about being a single father. I am not so much disturbed by a man expressing emotion, or suggesting that he shouldn't be emotional about losing his wife, child, and nearly losing his other children. I have to wonder, though, how many times he has told this story in a political context and why he acts as if the wound is still fresh. Feels a little melodramatic and "rhetorical" (in the bad sense) for me, but I am insensitive, sorry.

6. I ran into this this week and though it was really intersting, you all should check it out: http://rsa.cwrl.utexas.edu/node/2438
Lawrence Lessig, for those who don't know, is a renowned copyright lawyer and law professor at Stanford.

7. I think we should be excited to welcome Barack Obama into the White House and start spending lots of money on his security. The parallels that are being drawn between him and JFK in the media are so thick that it is cause for concern. I am not so much worried about someone attempting to hurt him based on his race. I am worried that a JFK fetishist will try to hurt him in order to produce a similar legacy.

For what it's worth,
K

Ok, ok

So in case it wasn't imminently clear, the names I suggested for B & T were jokes. Noone should name their child Skid (mark), that is just mean.

After much soul searching and discussion, we decided that we don't really think it is our place to impose names. All we would say is this: in our view, the name should probably have at least three syllables. The cadence is nice with their last name, and often three syllable names can be shortened, which gives you some versatility. So, for example, you could choose the name Allison and shorten it to Ally, or Joshua to Josh. P likes Isabel to Izzy.

Anyhow, we hope everyone had a lovely September. It went by entirely too quickly for our taste. Fortunately, it is starting to cool down out here.

Go Beavs!

We came home from watching a mediocre episode of Grey's Anatomy last night with 2 messages on our machine. The first was from P's mom reporting that Oregon State was beating #1 ranked USC in Corvallis, and that Shugs and Jimbo were at the game. The second message was from N who also updated us on Oregon State's lead of 21-0. We didn't think much of it knowing that USC would probably get their act together in the second half of the game and went to bed. Low and behold, we woke up this morning with news that the Beavers had beaten the Trojans in Corvallis--this may very will be USC's only loss of the season. Go Beavs!

This also happened two years ago on a rather foggy night when Shugs and Jimbo were at the game for Dad's weekend at OSU.

REVISIONS!!!

Ok, so T didn't go for any of the names that I suggested, so here are more options. You let me know which names you like best!

Boys
5. Trapper
4. Trickster
3. Seamus (as in "shay--muss")
2. Tatonka (a.k.a Buffalo)
1. Woogie
(p.s. I still like Boomer)

Girls
5. Lyra
4. Nastia (Nasty for short)
3. Shareefa (shari for short)
2. Miley Cyrus
1. Waynette

p.s. the goomba offer is non-returnable, right?

GOOMBA!

My bff B is having a B-A-B-Y and it is my duty as the Goomba (a.k.a the Godfather) to select the name for the child. As far as I know, B's wife T has ok'd this. So I now present to you the top 5 names for girls and boys, with the provision that emedations will be made in the future.

Boys
5. Chunk
4. Skid (middle name Mark? or is that too much?)
3. Coyote ("yo" for short)
2. Huey
1. Boomer

Girls
5. Lordes
4. Gladys
3. Rain
2. Sarah Palin
1. Shaniqua

Pumpkin Pancakes

In honor of our visit to the Morton Pumpkin Festival last weekend, we decided to make pumpkin pancakes for breakfast yesterday. Apparently Morton (just 20 minutes from Normal) produces 80% of the world's canned pumpkin at their Libby pumpkin factory. The pancakes weren't amazing, but good enough to recommend...and apparently more nutritious than the average pancake.

Here's the recipe:

2 cups complete pancake mix (such as AUNT JEMIMA® Buttermilk Complete)
1 1/2 cups water
2/3 cup LIBBY'S® 100% Pure Pumpkin
Nonstick cooking spray
Lite pancake syrup, if desired

I added a pinch of pumpkin pie spice and some cinnamon (but I'm not sure that we could really taste it). You just mix the ingredients and make them on a skillet, like normal pancakes.

Saturday Night Live

This SNL skit was too funny to pass up. I'm sure many of you have already seen it, but if not, you have to take a peek.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wi9WEj21h1g

New Job Idea!

Sorry it has been a while since we have posted, for those of you religious 'Nois readers gnashing your teeth (all three of you!)

So I had an idea for work if this whole doctor thing doesn't pan out. I think I could be a (quite successful) freelance political heckler. You know, go to rallies of the opposing party and try to throw off the candidate with my rhetorical savvy and rapier's wit. I might, for example, travel up to the Twin Cities this week (Lord knows I am close enough) for the Republication National Convention, make my way in (somehow) and play the chorus of Kanye West's Gold digger everytime John McCain references Sarah Palin--sing it with me, "Now I ain't sayin she's a golddigger, but she ain't messin with no broke . . ." well, you get the idea. Seriously, you really can't look at these two on stage without thinking about another, but substantially less-conservative power couple: J. Howard Marshall and Anna Nicole Smith. Even before Sarah Palin, I had a hard time disassociating John McCain from Mike Myers portrayal of Dr. Evil in the Austin Powers movies. I had visions of him going up to small children and saying, rather robotically, "c'mere, give daddy a hug" whilst they crying and running away scream "get away from me you lazy eyed psycho!"

Maybe the moral of the story (is this a story?) is if you are too easily caricatured, you automatically lose the election. This was John Kerry's (a.k.a Lurch from the Addams Family) problem, and although now we have plenty of caricatures for Bush (e.g. a monkey drinking his own pee), he was a little harder to tag. Al Gore . . . a bloated tranny addicted to botox or its organic equivalent, you get the idea.

So back to Palin, what an offensive wretch. Did she really, in her acceptance speech, make reference to Hilary Clinton as if their political values even began to match one another's? I mean, seriously, what is the criteria for creating a political sisterhood? Having a vah-jay-jay? Maybe the question Palin should be asking herself is: can I be a feminist and a republican simultaneously? Those who know me, and my scholarship, would chastise me for this rhetorical question whose answer is already built in ("no") but if you support a party that directly opposes women's rights and identifies with the most (violent) religious groups in the country, all the while listening to Rush Limbaugh, eating moose burgers, and polishing your NRA membership badge with Ted Nugent, you really only have one option. If McCain manages to win this race by "stealing" Hilary supporters through the act of "hiring" a female running mate, I am not going to consider myself an American, because that means I would be associated with the most unthinking collection of dupes in world history. Maybe Canada will take me back.

Anyway, back to this heckling gig. Based on the affective and physical response to such heckling, we could tell right away whether Republicans really valued the Constitution (e.g. freedom of speech) and wanted to get out of Viet-Iraq (e.g. if they kicked my @$$, they couldn't call themselves committed to peaceful opposition). Sure, I would be branded a terrorist by these guys, have my home justifiably tapped (thanks Patriot Act!), and be relegated to New Orleans (the place where the government doesn't care if you live or die), but I would be a hero to the Democrats, which, come to think of it, isn't really my goal in life. Plus, such heckling gestures would only diminish the truly groundbreaking message of hope that Barack Obama is offering to the country. Ok, no Kanye ghetto blasting, or nasty caricaturing, just blogging.

Back to work on the PhD, I guess [sigh]

Meandering Middle America

View Larger Map

P's parents have been visiting this past week. We have traveled all over the Midwest and still have more ground to cover. Last weekend featured an architecture cruise in Chicago; a walk from North Michigan Avenue down through Millennium Park, Grant Park, Buckingham Fountain, and ending at the Museum Campus; lots of Chicago food and shopping; a Cubs win over the Pirates at Wrigley; and a visit to IMSI.

We took a break on Monday just making applesauce and hanging around the B-N where we introduced P's parents to fried cheese curds--a Midwest delicacy. We then went shopping in Tuscola, Illinois on Tuesday and ate a fabulous dinner at M's.



After the restful Monday-Tuesday combo, we drove down to St. Louis on Wednesday afternoon where we got a Red Robin fix and made our first ever visit to Busch Stadium to watch the Cardinals overtake Man-Ram and the Dodgers--an outstanding ballpark and an exciting game with a Grand Slam by Pujols, and home runs from Man-Ram and Ludwick. Since it was a night game we didn't get to leave St. Louis until 9:45ish and finally arrived home around 12:30. We slept in on Thursday before P and the parents headed out for Galena, IL--on the borders of Illinois, Iowa, and Wisconsin.

During the Galena visit, we stopped by UW Madison (1.5 hours from Galena) and paid our dues to Iowa as well. Perhaps the highlight of this trip was watching P's mom sled down the alpine slides in Galena (yes, there is skiing in the 'Nois!). She was afraid to go too fast so she held the brakes the entire trip down the 750 slide from the top of Chestnut Mountain to the Mississippi River. Needless to say, the poor kids who got stuck behind her had completely caught up with her little sled and P and Shugs waited and waited....and waited at the bottom.



Northern Illinois (and the surrounding region) is very different from life in Normal as there are lots of rolling hills, dairies (though Shugs was very concerned about where the cows were), and rivers--no worries though, the corn and soy fields reminded us that we were indeed still in the Midwest and kept P from getting homesick for Normal.



We are now all back in the B-N and plan to attend the Illinois State Fair down in Springfield tomorrow before heading back up to Chicago for some pre-flight shopping on Monday.

Then, it's back to school....back to school....

--for more pics, check out our Picassa Page: http://picasaweb.google.com/JensenKP/ChicagoAndGalena2008

Mira Los Pepinos!

From our makeshift garden. P has the greenest thumb!

How 'bout a Fresca!?

Some things that are concerning me (K) of late:

1. Nobody knows Caddy Shack lines! The past couple of weeks, P and I have been drinking Fresca, and everytime we crack open a can, I say "how 'bout a Fresca?" hoping that someone will catch the pop culture reference. When I receive blank stares, I proceed to recite the lines "How would you like to mow my lawn? hmmmm?? hmmmmmmm???" to which I receive more blank stares. COME ON!!! This is Judge Smails (see below)!!! By the way Fresca is making a rampant comeback. If you have not had one recently, go to the store and refresh yourself. P and I have been addicted since our excursion to Mexico. They are probably right next to Tab and Diet Rite.











2. Reality television shows. Seriously, I am getting frustrated by the fact that the clear cut best performers in shows such as American Idol and So You Think You Can Dance are getting cut early or lose the finale. I told you all that David Archuleta was the best and predicted he would lose. Now, Will from So You Think You Can Dance gets cut? Makes you want to kick yourself in the teeth. Revote!

3. I saw Meryl Streep in Mama Mia earlier this week and nearly walked out of the theater. The logic (rightfully) goes: Meryl Streep is an exceptional actress and would not put herself through a bad movie performance. Apparently, that logic is faulty because the movie is awful. Whoever cast Pierce Brosnan in a singing role should be shot. The Abba songs, however, were great!

4. Our culture's sense of humor, generally. Last night P, M, and I went to the Shakespeare festival to see "Shakespeare's complete works." I was excited to go because, as many of you know, I love going to plays (generally) and seeing Shakespeare dramas (particularly). Unfortunately, this version of the Complete Works was guided by what can only be described as the Larry the Cable Guy effect; you know, hick guys with Nascar T-shirts being generally sexist, racist, classist, homophobic and stupid. I swear the phrase "Get Ur Dun" was recited at least ten times. In any event, everyone in the crowd was laughing hysterically at the -ist jokes that permeated the play and I couldn't help but feel as if was Shakespeare getting dissed and our culture was generally going down the crapper. Yes, Shakespeare told dick and fart jokes, but so much of the real humor of Shakespeare is sophisticated plays on language. This is the third comedy at this particular festival that has adopted this method. I have decided not to go back. But still I wonder, what is the fascination with this type of man (e.g. Larry the Cable guy)? I wonder if there is a correlation between the popularity of comics and the ethos of the president...in other words Larry the Cable Guy is funny because in varying degrees, he represents a version of the president. Anyway.

Back to work!

Picasa Makes it Easy

For those looking for a great way to share pictures (that is SUPER easy), try out picasa.google.com. If you have a Mac you can just select an album straight from iPhoto and the entire album goes straight to Picasa. It definitely beats having to attach photos one at a time onto a website or e-mails. I'm attaching our pictures from Marie's party. Just click the link and you can experience the fun. More to come soon!

Marie's Party.

A gift from P

Upon turning in the first chapter of my dissertation for inspection, P comes upstairs with a little bag and a giddy smile. She has been waiting all week to give me this present. See below, I couldn't have said it any better myself.

You can't make this stuff up!

As promised, here are some images from the Elmo beatdown. Did I overexagerrate the tenacity of great grandma Nord? Notice how when Breezy's mom (in the yellow t-shirt) goes after the 'mo, she strikes a diffident pose as if to say, "no way she can do better than I did!" You also have to love the picture of Max! He is seriously intense!

Rambeagle

We thought we would share this image of Bruchi. He had to go to the vet today to get his annual boosters and true to form, he made it difficult on them. Evidence of his struggle can be found on his front and hind paws that are wrapped in green bandages. Apparently, the baby food bribe wasn't enough of an incentive to stop wiggling. At one point, the vet tech got pushed away and her blood drawing needle stood still stuck in Bru. Needless to say, he expressed serious frustration at that point.

Full Frontal Critique

Yesterday, P alerted me to the news that The New Yorker had published a satirical image of Barack Obama and Michelle Obama on its most recent cover. Given The New Yorker's reputation for publishing images of political satire, I wasn't necessarily surprised until I saw the image (see below). Aptly titled "The Politics of Fear" it quite literally put me in my seat. As some of you may know, I have been writing about how America thrives on a culture of fear, encouraging its citizens to expel threatening images or messages (or people) when they come into close proximity with our bodies and borders. My interest has been explaining how phishing solicitations make insidiously subtle references to 9/11 to get people to give up their sensitive identity information to expel the "cyberterrorists" and restore security. There is nothing subtle about this, though. Full frontal fear, staring right at you.

Not surprisingly, the entire country is on fire. John McCain has denounced the cover saying that he would understand if Barack Obama was offended. And, of course, the Obama camp has called it distasteful. I think it is brilliant. No, it is not funny. No it is not meant to be funny. Like Borat, this image confronts America with its racial prejudices, identifies several of its deepest held fears (notice the burning flag in the fireplace), and doesn't blink. To me, it is similar to when my favorite comedian Daniel Tosh rails on midwesterners for their lack of culture while he performs in the midwest. As he says, (paraphrasing) "and yes I tell that joke in Omaha, and I stare at them while I tell it."

see: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ANsQ0s5wdck

Too bad people are going to get all liberal (or conservative) about this and never let it shake their bones. That Obama sparks this kind of thinking is, in my view, worth voting him into office. For what it's worth, I think Hilary Clinton would have forced us to confront a similar type of fear.

Maybe instead of producing fear all the time, we should try to confront it and work through it. No, that's entirely too sensible.

I Love Teach to Write (good)

I (P) have a few students who have discovered that my e-mail address is on the school website, so they have enjoyed e-mailing with me this summer. I figure it's a great way to keep them writing and reading during the time of year students' literacy suffers the most. On a more personal note, it also helps remind me why I love my job so much and will be excited to return come August. Below, you will see an e-mail from one of my students, let's call her Wanda. Just for some background, I had Wanda and her sister, "Gina," in my classes last year and have e-mailed with both of them this summer. Gina (a soon-to-be 6th grader) has e-mailed me frequently, and I just received Wanda's first e-mail the other day. I had asked Wanda if she had been reading, enjoying her swimming lessons, and writing any journals. The journals are a part of our meeting time everyday where students respond to a "question of the day" in a rather scripted format. The idea is to help 1st-5th graders write an organized paragraph at their appropriate age/linguistic level. Without stifling the students' creativity and composition skills, I include a few rather general grammatical rules--which we later learn to break. These rules include conventions like: Don't start a sentence with and, but, or because; Capital letter at the beginning of a sentence; period at the end; etc.

Here is Wanda's response to my e-mail:

will I am have allot of fun,but my swimming is not that good gina swimming is good and Mrs.Jensen I almost forgot that I can't start with a "but" in the begin of the sentences! opp!
will I have been reading books! :)

Who wouldn't love my job?!

Geriatrics Beatdown Elmo, seriously!

Yesterday, P and I had the distinct pleasure of celebrating our friends' son's second birthday party, and as you might expect we experienced the usual(ly wonderful) meal of pizza, pop, and cake, while witnessing the usual array of ridiculous games (pin the tail on the doggy, for example). You would also not be surprised to learn that since Maximus is a two year old, he had no idea what was going on with the present opening, which allowed us to make fun of his mom's high pitched squeals when she opened boxes containing a baker set, clothes, and some Canadian produced DVD for children (we got him the Letter Factory DVD to boost his literacy!). (my theory is that early birthday parties and Christmases are really for the parents). As the afternoon wore on, I contemplated taking my life with a balloon string after having to field multiple questions about when *we* were going to have "one of these little guys running around." However, I am glad I didn't grab for the balloon string, because as the party moved to the backyard, things got a little exciting and dare I say crazy!!!

Here's the short version. Stanimal, Maximus' dad, has a friend who lives in Chicago that brought down a pinata for the party. This pinata, Stanimal stipulated, must be from a Mexican grocery store (since we have Mexican grocery stores, why he couldn't get one from here is still confusing to me, but whatever). The pinata that Hector brought down was a massive Elmo that was the size of Maximus' mom Breezy. So, they strung up Elmo, hung it over the porch, and gave the string to grandpa to ensure that at least one person would get hurt when he pulled it up as they swung with all their might. So all the kids go up to beat down Elmo with a broom handle. Two year olds first, then the cousins who vary in age. They swing and swing, but the resilient Elmo would not break. The kids are getting impatient for the candy that they know is inside, so, what do we do? Instead of breaking open the pinata discretely, we hand the broom handle to Stanimal's grandma, Maximus' great grandma (he is mid-thirties, do the math) who proceeds to whoop Elmo's ass with an impressive fury. But! Elmo doesn't crack, so she gets tired and hands it to her daughter, Maximus' grandma, who then proceeds to whoop Elmo's ass further. Still, Elmo gives no ground. Hand it to the other grandma (same fury, same result). So they hand the stick to Breezy, who starts wailing away at Elmo only to have it unexpectedly swing in her direction and knock her down. Meanwhile, the kids are all crying because they can't figure out why all the old people are beating Elmo, and why Elmo has decided to fight back. So, now the men (after adjusting themselves) take the handle and wail on Elmo until they sever the body from the head. Patty, Breezy's sister, and I are all cracking up until we figure out that the kids aren't exicited to get the candy anymore. They didn't scamper to snatch it up, but kind of walked with trepidation toward it.

Moral(s) of the story
[1] If the sales chart didn't confirm this axiom, Elmo is one tough and resilient son of a %#*(@&%.
[2] Don't buy pinatas that are shaped like the cartoonish friends that kids see everyday and learn to read and write from.
[3] If you do decide against moral #2, don't extend the beating. Moreover, don't let Elmo knock you down.
[4] Grandmas are dangerous. They have the ability to unleash a fury that exceeds their physical limitations (and their often mild demeanor).
[5] Always go to parties where the opportunity for geriatric beatdowns of cartoon characters is a distinct possibility!

Oh, and you know there will be pictures!!!

the "do you remember me?" game...

P and I had lunch at a restaurant this afternoon, and our waiter happened to be one of my former students from three years ago. Except I couldn't figure out if she recognized me and didn't want to say anything because she wasn't sure if I recognized her, or if she seriously didn't remember me. I felt kind of befuddled because this is a student who I remember working closely with. It wasn't as if it was a student who sat at the back of the room and never said a word to me because they were sleeping the whole time. So, I spent the whole lunch wondering whether I should say hello and if so how I should do it so she wouldn't be uncomfortable. I decided to wait until she brought the check and asked her something really ridiculous like "how was your first year writing course" (no wonder everyone thinks English people are losers! Can't we just be normal?) and she suddenly remembered who I was and we talked for a bit.

Still, I left the restaurant feeling dumbfounded. I said to P, wouldn't you remember your old professors if you saw them in a situation like that? And she said yeah. Then I made the rather grandiose claim that I could remember my elementary school teachers if I saw them again (I really think I could!!!) Anyway, this left me wondering about how much time one should really invest in students given that it in some cases it clearly means more to you than it did to them. This is a terrible thing to say, especially for someone in my discipline, but shouldn't this cast doubt on the amount of investment one should make? Fine, you don't remember the lessons I taught you, but your can't recognize my face? I mean, I haven't changed at all. It isn't as if I have lost a bunch of weight or suddenly shrunk! This all sounds very narcissistic, so I am going to end the post. It just made me a little sad, since so much of why you teach is about building relationships with students. Of course, I have plenty of other students whom I still keep in contact, so there's no fire to put out. I'm just sayin...

...further proof, and oxford commas

While I have never had any doubts about whether I should have married P, I have had plenty of moments when it suddenly occurs to me just how good that decision was. One of those moments happened the other day when I was singing the lyrics to a song called "Oxford Comma" by Vampire Weekend. The opening lines go "who gives a #%*%# about an oxford comma, I've seen those English dramas too, they're cruel." Meanwhile, P looks at me and says, I know one person who gives a "#%(*)" about an oxford comma, and proceeds to tell me about a court case whose claims centered upon the absence of an oxford comma. Apparently, the issue was that in their last will and testament, the deceased didn't put an oxford comma before one of the recipient's names, and thus the court couldn't decide whether the assets should be divided in half or in thirds. So, for example, if I wanted to will something to peter, paul, and mary...I would have to put the comma after paul. if I didn't do that, and wrote instead "peter, paul and mary" then peter would get half while paul and mary would have to divide the other half.

This is why grammar matters, people! And, why moments such as these are vital to a happy marriage. You know, the moments where you think, my wife knows more about grammar than I do, and I love her for it. It's enough to send your spouse off to a linguistics course on the growth and development of the English language.

A Day in the Life

I watched the neighborhood, oh boy
attacked my wubba, and then I took a nap...

Hancock

I was seriously excited to see this movie, and we were (unfortunately) even more excited to leave it.

Wait for it on TBS! (yes I am implying that it isn't even worth the rental fee...not even if you can get it in one of those new red boxes where the movie is only a dollar!)

Surprise!!

Last night we held a surprise 30th birthday party for our good friend. She's always giving to others, so it was great to finally give back. Amazingly enough, all of her friends were able to keep the secret. I think we pulled it off because when she walked in (crochet bag in hand, ready for a quiet evening) and everyone shouted suprise, she started backing out the door in shock. It was a lot of fun. Here are some pix.

Montezuma's Revenge

Here are a few pix from our trip to Cozumel. We had a good time while on the island, but out stomachs have been feeling the effects ever since. We are both on a very bland diet, coupled with antibiotics and pepto tablets daily. We can't wait to begin eating real foods again...in the meantime, back to my ricecakes....ugh!

Hasta luego! Albondigas en la casa del Mexico!

We are heading off to Mexico tomorrow morning, but before we do, I want to share a story with you about our last trip to Georgia --- hopefully this won't happen again.

As you may or may not know we bought a new car this past month and one of the true pleasures of buying a new car is the new car smell. About a week before we drove down to Georgia, however, the Versa lost its new car smell to an odd, rotten kind of scent. I asked P, since she drives it most often, whether something smelt amuck. "Nope," she said "smells like new car to me." So I let it go thinking I was maybe smelling the garbage or something.

As we started driving down to Georgia, around Indiana, I started to smell the rotten scent again. I asked our friend M who was travelling with us, "do you smell that?" She replied, "kinda, what do you think it is?" I didn't know so I asked P again. . ."new car smell!"

Then, we get down to Georgia (in the Southern heat, mind you) and the smell grows into a serious problem. So we stop at a local outlet mall and grab some car freshener: Lily of the Valley to be exact. And for a day, the smell started to improve. It didn't kill the smell, it masked it...

So then we get to Indianapolis and the smell has kicked Lily of the Valley's @$$. By this time our friend M is rolling down the back window, applying and reapplying scented lotion. Meanwhile P's nose finally gets the newsflash and she says "oh, is that the smell you were talking about?"

Two and a half hours later, I am determined to find what is going on in our new car. So we unpack, and I start smelling: everywhere! I make it to the back seat, and under the front side passenger seat is an empty bottle of Pepsi. So I pick it up to throw it away, and a little purple box is smiling at me. My eyes get huge, and I pick it up. Opening it, I find a carton full of *black rotten noodles* that had been sitting in the car (through Indiana, Kentucky, Tennessee, Georgia, and back) since P had eaten there for her birthday lunch...I snatch them up, and run them into the house to ask P why she had left them in there for so long. She gives me a sheepish grin, "oops, forgot about those!" Seriously?

Keep in mind, had I done this, I would have been slaughtered. I would have not only been "irresponsible" and "disgusting," but "clearly less hygenic" than my counterpart and "committed to keeping a dirty car." She gets off the hook though because it "only happened this once." When have I ever left rotten noodles in the car, I ask?

Still waiting on the answer...

The smoke detector conspiracy

Following last night's--or rather this wee hour morning's--shenanigans, I am beginning to think that there is a smoke detector conspiracy. A conspiracy, K? Really? Yep, I am serious.

Here's what happens: our smoke detectors have *always* run out of batteries at 3am or earlier in *every* house we have ever lived in; as a result of having low batteries, the fire alarm chirps (incessantly), knowing full well that we do not have the kind that will stop the chirping; I, in turn, stumble out of bed and wander through the house trying to find the low batteried smoke detector; once I find it, I try to pull it down without tools (which never works); then I go and get tools and nearly break the thing (which wouldn't stop it from chirping anyway); I always forget that disconnecting the smoke detector will not make it stop chirping, and since I do not have the right batteries, I subsequently wrap it up into about four quilts and hide it somewhere (the freezer) until morning; I roll back into bed and end up thinking about my work for the next two hours (until the birds start chirping); then, once I finally get back to sleep the alarm goes off...

So, here's my relatively simple question: why can't the batteries run out in the daytime? They never have in our house, and I am beginning to think they never will. Hence, smoke detector conspiracy...

Impressive logic, I know, but seriously, what is happening here? Does this happen other places as well?

For further proof that this could, in fact, be a conspiracy -- see the Friends episode where Phoebe experiences a similar scenario. Yes, of course I am implying that Friends represents reality...

Happy Birthday!!!

It's P's birthday today, and how are we going to celebrate it? Well! P is going to be teaching from 8-4 and then once she gets back she has an hour before she has to go to night class. You had better believe that hour is going to be awesome, though! Plus, I am bringing her lunch, so that'll be fun too. Bru and I will eat some cake and enjoy her flowers for her this evening in her absence.

We are heading down to Georgia at the end of the week and will be driving through Louisville and Nashville. We'll celebrate in each of those cities, I think. Lil' barbeque and jazz at the Bluebird cafe, maybe. Maybe a lil' shopping at the Grand Ole Opry Factory Stores? Who knows, we won't be in Normal, that's fo sho.

Pictures to come!

A Spiraling Spring

At our cinco de mayo celebration last night, it was brought to our attention that we have not blogged in a LONG time. Perhaps this is because our Spring has been absolutely exhausting with non-stop school work. Since the last post....
-K found out that he successfully passed his doctoral exams
-P's tulips have bloomed...finally!
-Bruchi received a toy (a wubba) that he loved for about 3 days before he destroyed it
-K has turned in his dissertation proposal and is revising prior to his defense hearing
-P completed her 2nd semester of PhD coursework
-Bruchi continues to mimic the tornado siren during the tornado drills every Tuesday at 10 am
-K and P traded the truck in for a more gas efficient car -- we figured we would do our part in boosting the economy by putting our government rebate checks right back out there.

Coming up...
P goes to Oregon. K and P go to Georgia. P's bro returns from his 2 month backpacking Euro trip. Punjab and The Panther head to Europe. Lovebirds leave for a London wedding...not their own--but maybe they'll surprise us! Wow...it looks like we got the short end of the stick for travel destinations!

The Bunny Bowl

Sports fans, we have recently completed the first annual Bunny Bowl! What is the Bunny Bowl, praytell? Why, it is a single elimination Wii bowling tournament played between some of our friends here in the 'Nois: the Panther, Punjab, the lovebirds, Pirate, Pinky, P and myself. The number one seed, me, won. However, Punjab (the number seven seed) made it to the championship and P rolled her first 200 game to nearly beat me in the final four. For the first time, Bru remained in the room and heckled the crew with inopportune howls. Pictures to come.

Houston Wii Have Some Problems

In the past couple of days that we have owned a wii, we have learned some things that we did not expect. These things aren't negative per se, but they give us pause and call us to reflect on the thing we wished so hard for.

1. Bru is crazy scared of the wii. So scared that he runs upstairs and will not return until he hears that we are finished. At times he will come down to check on us to see whether we have broken something, but for the most part he wants nothing to do with this new gadget. We feel bad because he is our #1. Still trying to solve this problem.

2. P has developed wii arm, which means that she is complaining of soreness behind her right shoulder. This soreness doesn't lead to a reduction in wii play. It does, however, lead to an increase in griping. To solve this problem, P is learning to play with both arms. She is also trying to convince herself that she is as good with the left as she is with the right.

3. The unfortunate naming of the wii has also led to an increase in wii-wii jokes by all parties. I am complicit, P is too, but we are seeking counciling for our inappropriate social behaviour.

4. P is as interested in creating mii's as she is playing wii. This is confusing, so let me explain. The wii allows you to create cartoon characters called mii's that can look pretty close to what you see in the mirror (if you do it right). P is obsessed with this feature as we have more mii's than we know what to do with. Our neighbors have mii's, all of our good friends have mii's, heck we even have mii's of our family members. There is also an online site that gives directions on how to create famous mii's. For example, we have made Abe Lincoln, George W, Paris Hilton, Napoleon Dynamite and so on. I am going to create an Oprah mii and get in the boxing ring with her. Those who know mii know that this is not a secret desire to fight women, just a frustration with her book publishing habits.

More to come...

Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The hunt is OVER!!! We got a Wii yesterday...here's the amazing and heartwarming story. By the way, Lifetime contacted us last evening for the rights and told us that it should come out in November of this year. Here's an early preview, cue the music.

Last Sunday, we resolved to give up on the Wii search when P and I realized that to compete for a Wii in our town (note "compete" not "get") you have to sit outside Circuit City for almost three hours. That means that people are/were sitting out there around 6:00am. Crazy.

On our way to the windy city yesterday, however, our friend S called to tell us that her sister and her sister's husband were standing in line for them at a Best Buy in the burbs and wanted to know if we wanted them to pick one up for us? Answer: yes (in a supersonic high-pitched squeal from me). Mind you, we haven't made a deliberate trip up to the burbs since October, so for this to happen on the day we decided to "get out of Normal" was incredibly seredipitous (as if I wouldn't have driven up there just for that). We got this call while we were at Red Robin (one of P's and my favorite restaurants) with two of our good friends. So . . . let me get this straight, good food, not in Normal, great company and we get a Wii? Must've done something good! Actually, I made a wish by holding my breath over a bridge so do that cause it really works (not really)! (By the way, I was so happy to hear about the Wii that I nearly forgot that P and I were accosted by the Red Robin manager for drinking out of the same lemonade glass! sigh...)

So we got the Wii, and had the crew over to test it out. Best system ever! Everyone loves to play, and for the first time in my life I had to tell P that SHE needed to put down the video game and go to bed because she has to work this week (I am on SPRING BREAK).

Anyway, thanks to Pinky and the Pirate!

Happy 5th Birthday

Yesterday was our five-year-old nephew's birthday. Rumor has it Chuck E. Cheese was filled with A. and all of his little buddies--and of course his crazy little sisters. We also heard that pinatas no longer break after a few beatings from a five-year-old. It now takes adult intervention to get to the good stuff. Happy Birthday, A!

2 of 3

Last Tuesday, my final doctoral synthesis got approved which means that I have spent the past two Thursdays mornings/afternoons locked in a room taking 2 of my 3 doctoral exams. The first two exams are four hours long, in my case 9-1 pm, and they include responding to an essay question from your exam chair. As I found out, these exams are pretty taxing and I am pretty excited to be done with the two timed sections. The last exam question, which I received when I completed the second timed exam is a take home question that I have one full week to complete. Seems to me like you lose a bunch of time from the beginning and really have less than a week. Following the timed exam, the most productive thing you can do is stare blankly at a television so I have already lost today. I will lose tomorrow too because I have to work at the journal and teach. I am not worried, though. The question I received make sense to me and even though it will need to deal with some pretty complex issues, I have a feeling I will be alright. Anyway, just thought I would post because I haven't in a while. P is doing pilates and I am a little bored at the moment.

Some random final thoughts:

1. This winter has been way too long. It is nearly the beginning of March and it is still snowing outside. It is also freezing cold. This has been the worst winter yet.

2. I thought it was pretty funny that John McCain critiqued Barack Obama for *answering* a hypothetical question regarding the potential for Iraq Invasion 3.0 (in some distant future). I am not going to try to sway your vote, it is yours to make, but you have to wonder about the political integrity of a man who tries to critique a fellow candidate for actually answering a question. Anyway.

3. Yesteday espn aired a conversation between Skip Bayless and some other brilliant ncaa basketball analyst where each of them decided which teams were in the top 3. Memphis, who has only lost one (freakin tight) game to a very good #2 Tennessee team, was not mentioned by either. I believe the top three were North Carolina, Kansas, and UCLA. All three teams are very good, don't get me wrong, but this is what drives me nuts about espn analysts: they get all hyped for a #1 vs. #2 game, it is all they can talk about, and not more than four days later *neither* team is in the top 3. Questionable.

p.s. Skip Bayless is an arrogant airbag on par with Rush Limbaugh. Both make me sick

4. P tried to a Carmen Electra workout session, which should have been titled "Lap Dance your Way to a Better Body." The only requisite for being able to do this workout was a chair. P tried for about 3 minutes, then gave up. I was glad because it seemed like it was only a matter of time before she tripped over the chair and we needed to go the hospital. Why is it suddenly a fad to lose weight while pretending to be a stripper. Seems to be a double-layered form of subjugation. Not only are women working out to attain a fitter body that meets unattainable social norms (which men in most cases never think about) but to get that body, they are convinced that the best way to do so is to become the object of a sexualized gaze. Where is Billy Blanks when you need him?

5. I saw There Will Be Blood and concur that Daniel Day Lewis should have won the Oscar for best actor; the film would have been truly boring without him. In my view he is the best living actor and the film's overarching message was kairotic (timely).

6. Not surprised that Juno didn't win anything. In my view, the film was neither funny nor endearing. I liked all of the actors, but the plot and dialogue were both uninteresting and unimaginative. My students tell me that the soundtrack is awesome. To me, it sounded like a reprise of Napoleon Dynamite, which, for the record, was both funny and imaginative.

7. Why is Hannah Montana so popular? Seriously, I see her everywhere and I don't get it. at. all.

8. Why is Regis Philbin so popular? To me, he was utterly annoying in the red carpet pre-Oscar show. Best moment was when he tried to interview Jack Nicholson while he was talking to someone else, and Nicholson replies "heyyyyy its the reeeeegeeee" - that's it. I was laughing pretty hard!

9. Did anyone see the Moment of Truth episode where the woman confessed to cheating on her husband and wanting to be married to another man? Before that part of the show aired, the host came on and said "if it were my preference, this would never have been aired" and said repeatedly throughout "you don't want me to ask you this question" as if to say "I am getting paid to do this, NBC has advertised this episode for more than a week, and I am going to claim I am against it so that I can convince myself I had no part in destroying this family on national television." When will it happen that a host has enough integrity to simply get up and say, I am not going to participate in this anymore and leaves the show? Never, because that would require actual political commitment.

10. David Archuleta is amazing, best singer *ever* on American Idol, but he will NOT win (the best ones never do!)

11. LOST IS ON TONIGHT!!!!

12. What is with the sudden cultural obsession with Jane Austen?

13. Still no Wii! Prospects aren't looking good after four weeks of semi-invested research.

14. Cool technology tip: Edirol voice recorders. Simply amazing.

15. Eastern Promises is a good movie, but disturbing. Rent at your own peril and if you do you need to REALLY like Vigo Mortennson.

16. Liked Michael Clayton, a lot. (remember, P was REALLY sick all last week)

17. The beagle is really scared of other dogs. Today, our neighbor's dog ran up to him and all the hair on his back stood straight up. I think he thinks he might get attacked like he did when he was little. Poor boy!

18. My best friend is no longer blogging, this is a formal threat if he is reading this post.

19. Bru is running laps around the house. I love him!

20. Get an iPod Touch! Again, totally worth the money!

I am not technically a doctor yet, but come on...

For those who know P, it may be hard to believe that she has any faults. In fact, on more than one occasion, I have caught faint murmurings that catalogue the degree of her perfection. This post is meant to alert you, however, that she does indeed have a fault: she is the most stubborn human being alive. Case in point. P spent most of yesterday curled in a blanket passing in and out of sleep with what appeared to be a nice combination of a flu and sinus infection. She was so sick that she spent most of the night swetting out a fever and most of the morning shaking around a cup of tea. In spite of this obvious illness, P informed me when I returned home from teaching this morning that although she was not feeling any better, she would be going to school to conduct parent-teacher conferences. Let it be known that twenty minutes before she left I had to shake her from a sleep deprived stupor.

Following a good two hours of conferencing, P then informed me that she would be going to night class for three hours. I told her she needed to stay home, that she was sick, and that she would regret leaving the house. Shockingly, I was right. I just picked P up about twenty minutes ago and she was shivering, hacking, and generally the most unhappily sick she has been since we have been married. So sick, in fact, she looked at me and told me "you were right, I should have stayed home" (I nearly drove into oncoming traffic I was so surprised). P is now in bed, and we'll see if she has learned her lesson. My theory on sickness is that if it hurts to get up, your body is telling you not to. If you care about this woman, please call her not to tell her you hope she feels better (you may do so, of course), but that she should listen to the people who care about her.

P, the scholar

I sometimes like to jot down things I hear people say that seem fun or contradictory or stupid, so I thought I would share something P said in the car on the way home from dinner. We were discussing the possibility of her teaching in a strictly bi-lingual classroom and she said:

"I don't want to learn anything new right now, I am getting a PhD"

P the scholar folks.

p.s. I have been instructed to include that she sat through a seven hour class that met one hour outside of where we live.

iLovethis iGadget

I bought this yesterday and thought I would announce to everyone who reads this blog that it is awesome. The iTouch iPod is just like the iPhone, just without the phone. It comes with a built in wifi port so that wherever there is an Internet signal, I can check my email, read the sportspage, whatever. It also comes with an iCal day planner, a video player, YouTube capabilities, google maps, etc. If you have thought about getting one, or think such things are worth the money, I highly recommend it.

The Siren

Those who have frequented the J house know of one wiley beagle who, on occassion jacks his head up in the air and lets out a bay that could wake the dead. We have often joked about this habit of his by calling him a siren and on occasion an asshole. Yesterday, though, a real siren (a tornado siren) blasted outside loud enough to wake Bru from his mid morning nap. Confused, the groggy beagle stood up on the frame of our couch and stared out into space. Then, for no apparent reason, he stuck out his neck and began to mimick the sound letting out a low ooooooohhhhhhh (as opposed to the normally loud WOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!). This got me wondering, did he think that the tornado siren was a long lost family member and if so, what kind of communication strategy is an oooohhhhhhhhhh?

Apart from all that, it was one of the cutest moments of his life. Just thought I would share.

Snow Day, and, Thoughts on the LOST Premeire

SNOW DAY! If you work in education, you still get the thrill of anticipating the possibility that school might get cancelled the next day due to inclimate weather. I know that I am not the only one who feels this way because P said (giddily) to me as we returned from our friends' house last night "if it is a snow day tomorrow, we should make a snowman!"

5:10 rolls around, we get the call, NO SCHOOL! So we are going to hang out with the beagle today. Get some work done. Shovel the driveway, who knows what else! And who cares, it is automatically FUN DAY because it is SNOW DAY. We didn't get a lot of these growing up in the NW, though I hear it is crazy out there now. SO this must be the midwest's redeeming value, that and low costs for housing.

Anyway. LOST Premiere.
I was not disapointed, though, I need to watch it again before any of these tentative observations are solidified:

1. On the flashforwards: Jack from Jack's flashforward is not Jack from Hugo's flash forward. They want us to think that they are with the line "I am thinking about growing a beard," (Jack to Hugo) but don't let that fool you. Kate from Jack's Flashforward is not Kate, and I think that coming flashforwards will prove that theory. In other words, my feeling is that they feel themselves as mentally unstable, but perceive each other as totally stable.

2. Jacob is in the coffin.

3. Still convinced that this show is about melancholia, and that this island is not real, if real means that they are all actually there. I still think this is a psyche ward, or something close to it.

4. Ben is not dangerous (anymore), Ben vis a vis Jacob was dangerous though. Locke becomes even more dangerous when he converses with Jacob, and takes Ben's place as the leader of the pack. That much is obvious!

5. Interesting that Hugo can see/hear Jacob. I love Hugo.

6. Mikhail can't die, which sucks because I can't stand his character.

7. Naomi is/was not bad. She was a pawn.

8. The bald, black dude who talked to Hurley is an illusion. A diversion to the audience of the show, if you will.

9. N, this one is for you. The trauma that ties everyone or everything together is trauma associated with the lost of the parent, specifically the father. Every major character has lost, abused by, or had an absent father. These consistent references to mirrors makes me think that the psychoanalytic theory from Lacan is playing a huge role in this whole thing. He is famous for claiming that our subjectivity is forged out of "the mirror stage" - think, particularly the references to "through the looking glass." Melancholia is also imagistically tied to mirrors.

10. Love this show. So well written. Here's to hoping that the writers settle before the shows run out.

That's all I got for now. Hasta!

...---...

more colder than it has ever been...
winds blowing so very hard...
beagle frozen to the bones...
yetti in the backyard eating our yews (dang you Pearl!)...

no place for a healthy and happy human life...
stay away from midwest...

signed,
popsicle

The Namesake

When I was growing up, I had certain people in my life who took a serious investment in my happiness. I would call these people friends, but in many ways they feel more like family since they have been around for so long. In 2000, this couple became pregnant and despite being significantly close to the due date, they traveled to a basketball game that I was playing in (in Montana in the winter) to catch up, take me to dinner, and notify me that they were planning on naming their unborn son after me. As a then-18 year old, I hardly grasped the significance of their gesture, and simply told them that I was honored that they would think to do so.

Now, more than eight years has passed, and today is my namesake's birthday. I had the chance to get together with him over the summer to waterfight, shoot some hoops and in general learn about what a wonderful kid he is becoming. Utterly cerebral, he promises to be something truly amazing in the future, an engineer perhaps. He also has a gentle spirit with a rhetorician's guile, not to mention a jumpshot that would make most kids his age jealous.

I always blush when his parents say that they hope he turns out to be half the man I am (becoming). Although it is an amazing and kind gesture, I think, what a gift to be symbolically connected to someone whom you admire at age 8, someone who you hope your son turns out to be like. To put it somewhat differently, in naming him after me, his parents meant to honor me, but I am finding that as this young boy grows up, I am honored to be attached to him.

This post, then, is meant as a touchstone for him. Something to read now look back upon later so that he knows he was loved in more ways than he probably could understand at the time. That is how reflect now on his parents, and someday I hope he thinks of me in a similar way.

Happy birthday, lil' K. We love you so much.

hell hath melted (over)

P is out of town today taking classes, leaving me to ruminate in silence with the beagle. To pass the time, I have been feverishly composing the final synthesis for my doctoral exams. Ok, maybe not feverishly, but I have been working on it pretty hard. As I looked up while thinking through a particularly unimportant problem in composition theory (let's be honest) I noticed that the sun was out and that the 4-inch thick layer of snow in our backyard was beginning to melt. Excited and needing a break, I said to myself, I think I am going to head out and *run* some errands, but Bru heard me say run, got uncontrollably excited, and so I changed my plans.

Poor Bru has been pretty cooped lately because it is not healthy human, let alone healthy beagle weather. So instead of running to get groceries, I put on my eskimo gear and took Bru for a *run* around the lake. It was good to get out, the weather wasn't bad, and Bru was so utterly content to be outside that he ran alongside me the entire way (a feat, to be sure!). Well, he took a quick poop, and made an additional pit stop to bite into the frozen fish head laying on the path, but for the most part he was wonderful. Now, he is tired, as evidenced by him sleeping on my shoulder as I type this post. Such an amazing thing to have a good, and tired puppy.

In other non-related news.

[1] We finished LOST, and are eagerly awaiting the season premiere on Thursday. My theory, if anyone is interested, is that all the characters suffer from acute melancholia indicative of post-traumatic stress disorder. The island may be a psych-ward. Think about it before you reject it, this is advice that the skeptic P refuses to follow.

[2] A new and wonderful restaurant opened in uptown Normal this week. Tasty burgers and good onion rings. P got the pasta, wasn't as good if you ask me, and horked my onion rings.

[3] I keep wanting to buy a Ninetendo Wii but can't beat the losers to the register. I keep calling random stores hoping that they will have one in stock, but alas no luck. The news is always, had some on Thursday, they sold out before we even put them on the floor.I wonder, if I am so eager to buy the Wii, does that make me a loser by default? My answer is no, because I am only casually shopping, although I will admit to some sale associate harrassment in an effort to secure information on potential shipping dates, but that is just good researching. P's answer is a decided YES! even though she totally wants one too.

[4] P made cous cous with all kinds of fancy crap in it and it is pretty good. You should try it.

[5] *Sniff* I need a shower, bad.

[6] If a Depew is reading this post, please update your blog. I know you are busy, but come on, it has not been passable lately. You got us into this mess, hold the line or get served!

[7] Husky football season tickets are now in the J family again. My dad is the best in the world, bar none. I get to go out to Oklahoma next fall to watch them play. It will be my first trip to Washington in more than four years. I may never return.

[8] My parents have put their house up for sale in the VA which means they are on their way back to the NW here shortly. Lucky (in the Napoleon Dynamite voice).

Hasta!

Thoughts on Siberia

I am no Russian historian, but if I remember correctly, Siberia is the place where conspirators against the communist regime were sent to be punished and tortured. It would seem that part of that punishment was Siberia's extremely cold weather which would freeze the poor bodies of these individuals and render any hope of happiness utterly impossible. You can imagine my excitement, then, when Sam Champion from Good Morning America announced that today would be an extremely cold one for the midwest. As he explained and I am not exaggerating a cold front has been building up in Siberia and a wind current has pushed those temperatures down through Canada and right into Normal. Ergo, I am in Siberia.

Having been here three years now, I can confidently say that I have never felt cold like this before. In most cases, the cold is a kind of bone-chilling, grab a cup of hot soup, get inside soon lest you lose your ears kind of feeling. This, however, is something different, and I am not willing to spend more than a minute out in it so that I can describe it more accurately.

At least the sun is shining, though.

You Know You're Funny When (?) . . .

The saying goes: when you make someone laugh so hard they pee their pants you know you are funny. But what happens when you tell a joke that makes someone laugh so hard they fart in public? Is that more/less funny, and does the gender of the farter matter?

My view is that if you tell a joke that makes a guy laugh so hard he farts, you aren't as funny as you would be if you told a joke that made a girl "holding it in" fart. But isn't that sad, why aren't girls afforded the same farting privileges as men? I am such a fascist.

As it turns out, I made a girl laugh so hard she farted in public last night. Thoughts? Congratulations?

The Status Quo

No clearer indication that things are back to "Normal" than freezing @$$ temperatures outside (1 degree), P upstairs composing a paper that reflects on her educational practices as a "servant leader" (bleh) with candles lit and a quilt wrapped around her waist with Enya or Yanni or some other y-named performer who sold their last name (at Walmart for 3.29 on a rollback special) playing in the background (she is into a new age writing practice that she is now calling, humorously enough, post-process (my dissertation topic)), Bru passed out on the couch, and me click-clacking blogs between studying for my doctoral exams. We did, however, purchase all three seasons of LOST on DVD, which let me say has been the highlight of the week. If you haven't seen it, see it, now, seriously, no, I am not playing, don't make me stick P's Tai Chi moves on you, you heard what happened to Pearl (the yetti).

Not much else. Gonna go to the library, maybe fold some laundry and may organize the closet, but there might not be enough time. . . never enough time.

Ding, Dong, Ditch

There was something eerily suspicious about the fact that all of our bags arrived in Chicago and were the first ones out of the carousel. Then, when we walked outside, our shuttle was waiting for us, took us directly to our car, and we got out of the lot without any difficulty. It looked as though we would arrive home well before ten o'clock . . .

Then the blizzard hit . . .

For nearly three hours, P and I lurked down the interstate at about thirty miles per hour, getting passed by massive trucks, and counting how many cars had swerved off the road. At about twenty-one cars, and ten miles from home, a twelve-foot Yetti jumped onto the interstate, picked up our truck and tossed us into a ditch filled with snow. Pissed at the Yetti for his severe act of aggression, P jumped out of the car (in subzero temperatures) tackled the Yetti and wrestled it into the super-secret Tai Chi sleeper hold she calls the praying Tiger. Meanwhile, I attempted unsuccessfully to remove the truck from the ditch, so we called Triple-A to see what might be done (since the Yetti's feelings were hurt and thus was no longer willing to help us out, let it be known that I just wanted to talk it out with him). As we were on the phone with Triple-A, Joe from Joe's towing offered to help us out for a minor fee and so we said yes, get us out of the ditch. So he did. And we crawled home to safety.

If THESE shenanigans don't provide further evidence that we don't belong here, I don't know what else would. Fortunately, no one was hurt, except of course, the yetti, whose name we came to learn was Pearl.